What do you think is a relief? Ask me, 10 minutes back I was in the bathroom relieving myself after I endured a 2 hour long train ride to return home. The winter warm, trickle of urine that came out from within me, calmed me like a descending stream from the Himalayas. This morning, I left home at 7:30 am after a quick bath during which I relieved myself on the bathroom floor. But such is the pressure that builds in my bladder during winters that on a precautionary note, I relieved again in a span of 15 minutes . First when I bathed and second after I got readied. I thought leaving home sans a drop of urine in my bladder, I won’t have the urge for next 3-4 hours.

I was wrong and just in 45 minutes I started feeling the urge in the basement metro. The urge of a glass full of lemon water that I gulped this morning. I dislike using all kinds of public urinals (malls, airports, metro station etc.) for I cannot stand the filth. I think over the years, as a woman, I have got accustomed to carrying my day as usual with the piled up, painful urge to urinate. Roads are not for me. Yes, it does create a discomfort but it’s better than sitting on a commode that is being used by hundreds of females before. For me, my privacy starts from my cleanliness which I refuse to share with any random stranger.

For this reason, I lovingly mock my son when he relieves himself in the park or on a street, like any other man. I tell him, ‘So you are using your patriarchal privileges’ as the cutesy son gives me a puzzled look. It will take him some years to understand that only men can pee on the road. But he has a rare mother, who leveled men even in this skill 🙂

I tell him further, ‘I resent these privileges you have got to relieve yourself anywhere you wish to.’. On multiple cab rides, the drivers excuse themselves on the way, as they get down to urinate. And it helps the water impoverished, street plants too. Urea is a fertilizer. I carefully instruct my son to direct his pee exactly at the point where the roots of plant are. So that the heat brazened plant can draw some temporary solace from the sprinkle of urine. And he is a born artist. He makes intricate circles on the muddy ground with his urine.

For the nameless men, who pee on the wall of the park I go for my morning exercise every day, I have a word of advice. You might consider peeing on the ground so that the high protein pee benefits the plants, who are seldom watered by the maali. Peeing on the wall, makes the brick soggy and algae and lichens grow on it. It looks bad.

So one day when during a walk, my partner distanced himself from me as he went away peeing, I could not hold it any long. I said to him that I too want to pee on the street like him, like every other man. And I love him for he helped me fulfill this longstanding childhood dream. It was 9:00 PM and we were standing at the rear road of our society. There are few vegetable hawkers who leave by 8:30 PM and after that the entire road is deserted barring a 65 year old watchman, who naps most of the time.

The timing was perfect, except for a group of laborers who were working in an under-construction building. My feminine coy was alarmed as I sighted those laborers. I asked my partner to stand in between mine and their view so that they don’t find me out. As my partner sheltered me with his shadow, I bent and squatted and relieved at the muddy edge of that road. And as I quickly got up and zipped my pants, I exclaimed with joy.

‘Hurray, I finally peed on the road.’