• Vulva

Let’s get Cliterate!

The clitoris is pure in purpose. It is the only organ in the body designed purely for pleasure. 

Eve Ensler, The Vagina Monologues

I was 15, bed-ridden, recovering from a long illness just before my 10th boards and that is when I was introduced to my clitoris during self-pleasuring, only I didn’t know what it was called then. In my first long-term relationship the man didn’t know much about the clitoris either, but it did get stimulated during oral sex which we did engage in a lot. By then I knew what it is called and how to stimulate it myself.-Pooja Priyamvada

Do you know the humankind had not discovered the full anatomy of the clitoris until as late as 1998 when the book Anatomy of the Clitoris came out? In the 1400s, a guide for finding witches considered the clitoris, believe you me, the “devil’s teat,” and any woman with one could be labelled a witch.

In the 1920s, Princess Marie Bonaparte, a French psychoanalyst who was herself termed “frigid”, collected Clitoris -Vagina distance data from her patients and in 1924 published the observations using a pseudonym.

The rule of the thumb emerged from there- meaning if the Clitoris-vagina distance is less than 2.5 cm, roughly equal to the distance between the tip of the thumb to the first knuckle women get good orgasms during sex. If the distance is more than it is suggested that a regular intercourse might not lead the woman to the big O.

Imagine having all those centuries of sexual and sensual life before us without any specific knowledge of such a crucial organ of the female body and pleasure. Though women must have known that other than the vagina there is a specific part in their privates that send them on waves of pleasure if stimulated well and properly.

Pallavi Barnwal says:.

“I never knew that this existed in my body until 2 years back after I did intensive work on sexuality. All my male partners were as ignorant as I was in knowing that Clitoris stimulation is essential to reach orgasm. I remember telling them “Touch me here, stimulate me here. Clitoris was that ‘here’.”

Dear men and women, please make a note, strictly technically speaking the glans of the clitoris contains about 8,000 nerve endings, that’s twice as many nerve endings as the penis has. Yes! So literally the powerhouse of sexual pleasure is not the revered, strong lingam but the humble small clit!

In Swedish they coined a term some time back – “Klittra” referring to a woman masturbating. The word was created by combining “clitoris” and “glitter”. The little nub can definitely make women see the stars during the day if it gets proper and adequate attention by the woman herself and her partner.

Sophia Wallace has now created Cliteracy– an art project that fuses street art, textiles and other forms of art to educate the largely “cliterate” modern society.

The clitoris has varied alternate names – the bean because of its usual appearance, lady boner because of the penis-like enlargement it displays during arousal and the obvious and boring clit! Is ahll call it an orgasmic iceberg!

if you actually take a Clifie (selfie of clitoris) you will find it looks like a tulip emoji. It is made up of the same erectile tissue as the male penis and when aroused it even fills with blood and engorges in size and girth. So many frustrated women wonder: “What’s wrong with me? Why do I only get clitoral orgasms?”

Dear men instead of going straight for the “bull’s eye” try to use the index and middle fingers to rub circles or back-and-forth motions, or use your tongue in addition to flick this part gently to send her those pleasure spasms.

Just like smart gadgets you need to press this button just right, too strong and the device might switch off completely, too soft and it won’t switch on. A clitoris is slightly more delicate and complex. However a female body isn’t a machine and the same button might yield different results at different times.

“A woman’s body is like a violin; it takes a terrific musician to play it right”.

  • J D Salinger

There is no “perfect way” to stimulate the clitoris one has to constantly do some fieldwork down under and experiment. Be creative, use different lubes, textures , positions and who knows, it might take you to new heights of pleasure hence unknown.

67% of women prefer stimulation in or around and not directly on it as the recipe to fill that orgasm gap.

Female pleasure is not just derived from just one spot. The pleasurable pathways to explore in a woman’s body are complex but one button is definitely the point to consider literally!

When it comes to women’s bodies, it’s safe to say the clit is reigning queen of pleasure and sexuality. Because men don’t have a clitoris and there are no signposts down there men and women need to guide each other on this for mutual pleasure. this little bud is  all a man/woman needs to get the orchestra of the body playing right!

By |2019-11-11T12:24:11+00:00September 5th, 2019|Orgasm, Women|9 Comments


  1. Preeti Singh September 7, 2019 at 4:47 am - Reply

    Very educative 👍🏻

  2. Patansheel Notes September 15, 2019 at 12:07 pm - Reply

    पठनीय शानदार और सटीक । कल शेयर करूंगी इसे

  3. Mushir Gadhi September 15, 2019 at 1:54 pm - Reply

    Wow, u cannot write these things in hindi.

  4. Rishi kumar September 16, 2019 at 8:04 am - Reply


  5. Peter October 6, 2019 at 12:57 pm - Reply

    Sure education

  6. Rumi Chowdhury November 4, 2019 at 12:12 pm - Reply

    Oh, yes, discovered so late in life, but oh so delightful! Salinger, you are so right

  7. Tito jose January 13, 2020 at 10:45 am - Reply

    Well read and the information was something so new for me. well written & ofcourse the history also behind it. Pooja your articles as well as your post i always keep waiting. waiting fro your next.

  8. Lion January 14, 2020 at 7:33 am - Reply

    I did not know prior to it. Very important information. 👏👌

  9. Lion January 14, 2020 at 7:33 am - Reply

    I did not know prior to it. Very important information. 👏👌

Leave A Comment

Ask Sex Coach

You don’t need to settle for a mediocre love life. Light up your bedroom with our advice.

I agree to the Terms